Things we learned this week

Profound lessons, every one.

First of all--and this is important, so pay attention--"Extra cheese?", especially in the interrogative mood, does not mean, "Do you want a surplus of cheese over and above what you already have?" That is to say, it is not a hermeneutic intended to uncover the presence or absence of an existential desire for supernumerary slices of cheese.

No, it means more simply, "Do you want cheese? That'll be extra."

"Extra" is in contextual effect a misplaced modifier, and in actual fact a dangling modifier. Dangling like melty cheese, for which I have now paid a surprising extra. We learned this by refusing the "extra cheese," thereby getting no cheese at all.

Also, for the first few months of his schooling, the Emirati girls would often tease Riley, giggling and laughing at the mere pronouncement of his name. He did not mention this, of course, until recently, when he was informed by a smirking colleague that "Riley," phonetically, means "my husband" in Arabic. Well, we gave this a good long Pooh-think, and determined that the appropriate response to the Emirati girls calling him by name would be "You wish!" or "In your dreams, Sweetheart!"

So you can imagine the scene:

Emirati girl asks, "Who knows the most about Canada?"

"Oh," replies another. "That would be Riley."

"You wish!"

Or another scene:

"I'll be in the seat next to Riley."

"In your dreams, Sweetheart!"

It goes without saying that Riley has had neither the courage nor the self-possession to follow through, though he did acknowledge the especial hilarity of the tagline to the accidental pun.

Now he tells us that Riley is in fact meaningless in Arabic, but I think his leg has been pulled yet again, and I intend to ask my students about it this week.



A bit early this time: I won't be able to blog on Friday, or Saturday, or perhaps ever again, if this pace keeps up. Wendy will likely tell you something about Christopher's Arabian birthday. We appreciate, as always, your faith and prayers, etcetera. We're considering a change of school next year, and could use some clarity.


Shout outs: Steve and Camille for having a new baby boy. Especially Camille cuz, well, she actually did the having. But boo-hiss for calling the poor kid "Perry." Ay caramba. I know it's a Clegg name, but c'mon. Congrats to Steve for the promotion. Camille, we hope you recover quick like a bunny.

Adam: for funniest comment almost ever, but on purpose. See Jonahisms.

All y'all for digging us so much and coming back for more. By the way, I've taken restrictions off commenting, so feel free to say a few words now and then. We like knowing you're out there. Ask questions, voice exceptions, make requests, sound off: just keep it clean, and don't ask us to work too hard.

Seacrest out.